Attention ladies - we love you but this has to stop

I know many of my readers are women. I know what kind of chocolate you like. I know your shoe sizes. I'm in marketing; you should know that I analyze my blog stats on a very regular basis. You should also know that I'm going to call you out because I know what you've done. And, painfully, I'm sure your husbands are tired of it. We men have been quiet long enough, and now it's time for you, oh fairer of the sexes, to face the music.

That's right, we're not going to take it any more. Ever since we learned how to control our bladders at the age of two or three, or later in some cases, women have harped on us to lift the lid. You've trained us to change our underwear on a daily, in most cases, basis. You've trained us to use coasters for our drinks. Now it's your turn to get schooled.


I'm talking about how you treat our bbq grills. Obviously your fathers never trained you the way our mothers trained us to keep the toilets sparkling clean [notice I said they "trained" us; that doesn't mean we do it]. Our grills are to us like clean toilet seats are to you. We don't mind you using our grills, especially when it involves food (not that I can think of any other uses). Thank you for feeding us, really. But, you've got to learn how to take care of our grills. We should not open the grill next time we feel like throwing on some burgers or dogs to find crusty, greasy, ant-covered residue. You know those grill brushes? They're meant to be used, and meant to be used immediately after removing the food from the grill. That way there's nothing left behind. Once you've scrubbed the grill clean, it needs to be sprayed down with cooking spray to prevent
rust. Oh, and one other thing, please turn off the gas when you're done. My darling learned that the hard way when I went to grill the next time and found the dials turned on high and the tank empty.

We'll make you a deal. We'll keep your toilet seats up [but you can't blame us if you forget to put them back down] and our underwear changed regularly [or daily depending on your requirements] if you'll scrub down the grill when you're done making dinner. It's all we have; it's all we ask.

For more information on grill maintenance, please refer to this tutorial. It was written by a man, a man with a pony tail, but still a man.